Night One

i'm a texan now.

at least, for a few months.

i probably shouldn't say that at all, actually. my dad warned me against coming back as a fan of texas. we all know that colorado is better than any other place anyway.

and now, a quote. "you may all go to hell, and i will go to texas." -davy crockett

what do you think that means? everyone who doesn't go to texas might as well go to hell? or texas is equivalent to hell?...

ps: i don't agree with davy. but i thought it was kinda funny anyway

To Hutto With Gusto. Kind of.

Well, it's finally here. A day I have anticipated for sooo long. I leave for Texas in the morning to pursue a dream I've had for a very long time. Funny thing is, now that it's happening I feel strangely apprehensive.

Given the current status of my heart and spirit, I suppose my apprehension isn't so strange. I'm emotional, scared, lonely. Being outgoing and confident at school will take 34 times more effort than it would on a day where I feel pretty good about life. Staying under the safety of my parents' roof with the company of my family nearby sounds pretty appealing at the moment. Thankfully, even before any of the past week's events transpired, Annie decided to tag along on my drive down there so she could see Austin. I am so glad I will have her company on the journey and I think we will have a good time together. She's rad, by the way - and she knows how to take care of me. Come Monday evening when she flies away, I suppose then might be an appropriate time for a melt down.

But I'll still have Gabe! That is a phrase I have been using quite often lately. He is such a good boy. Even when he's not good. I am not totally sure how he will take to being in a car for 11 hours, but let's pray he is manageable. Maybe one other prayer is that he will not throw up in the car like he did on the way home from the airport. Annie's car is still recovering from the smell and might be for quite some time.

Ok. That is my send off blog. Stay in touch with me. It means more than ever right now.

And such as.

I personally believe that US Americans are unable to do so because some people out there in our nation don't have maps. And, uh, I believe that our education like such as in South Africa and uh the Iraq everywhere like such as and I believe that they should our education over here in the US should help the US or should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries so we will be able to build up our future. For our.

If you're confused, you need to watch this.


When I get bored, I get sad. There are things I could be doing. Should be doing. Packing? Should. Could. Cleaning? Same story. I did get a hair cut. And an oil change. The rest of my energy is put towards internal matters. So I guess mindless videos and entertainment provides a minor escape. I'm only human. And while I really feel for Miss South Carolina...she is the closest thing to giving me a smile this afternoon.